alone

Three summers ago, during a summer project to North Myrtle Beach in South Carolina, there were days when I would walk around the apartments that summer projecters lived in to try to get someone to go with me to share the good news of Jesus Christ on the beach, but nobody was interested. They were tired from their job, needed to write a letter, or just didn't feel like it. A couple of days, I went sharing by myself (it's a lot scarier without a buddy), but I would mostly just say "lousy" and do something else. I felt like initiative evangelism on the beach was one of our main purposes of being on summer project, but when I couldn't get anyone to get on board with me, it was pretty hard to get on board myself.
The other days, the ones where I didn't really want to go share the gospel anyway, there was nobody to push me to obedience, and I certainly wasn't pushing myself.

I'm getting some of the same feelings here in Mexico. On days when I do want to go to campus, I can usually muster the courage to go by myself (God has grown me, or made me more crazy, or something), but on days when I don't (like today), there isn't anyone saying, "Hey, you can do this; I'll go with you." So, regardless that I set today aside to go looking for belivers on a strange campus, it's raining, I'm tired, I feel like it's pointless anyway, and the university is likely closed, so why bother?
Because Jesus died so that they could know him. Because they very likely need encouragement, and becuase they are way better at sharing the gospel in this culture than I am.
Please pray that God will remind me of his truth, his love for me, and his power over sin and death and fear. Please ask him to give me courage, faith in his promises, and a will to discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified.
And if you want to write a note (click "comment" below), I would really love it.
-later-
I decided, about half way through the day, to use it as my time to pour over scripture, read some good advice, and relax. I had originally set aside tomorrow for 'sabbath,' but my plans never really seem to work out anyway. I read part of Celebration of Discipline. It's good, and I think I'm going to attempt to learn the disciplines Foster is talking about.